Echoes of a Broken Soul

Memories – Wash over me, coating my full body. Film reel spinning in my mind, Feeling the vibrancy entirely. Snapshots of photographs –  Flashing for my eyes to see, Blinding me –  Vignettes of days gone by. Noise – just noise – Cacophony of noise, Cymbals crashing – Orchestrating Voices in my ears. Joy. Hurt. Wonderment. Happiness. Pain. Fear. Clawing, embracing, gripping. Enveloping my completeness. Fragrant perfume –  Aroma of nostalgia, Lavender, Jasmine, Sweet-Pea. Lilac, Freesia, Peony. Bouquet together – Tickling my nose. Gentlest touch – Of hands once held. Caresses – Whispering across my skin. Surrounded –  Enwrapped. Encompassed –  Cocooned. My senses awaken –  All at once.

Memories Come flooding back to me— Movies in my mind, Photographs for my eyes to see. Noise—just noise— Voices, music, shouting in my ears. There’s joy. There’s hurt. Happiness, trauma. Pain and fear. A fragrant perfume Tickles my nose. The gentlest touch Of hands once held Whispers across my skin. My senses awaken— All at once.

I’m in the position, To make it my mission –  To sail my past down the river. I need to let go, be free, And I know –  I won’t let this eat me forever. So, I’ll write out a plan, I know that I can –  Know what freedom feels like. It’ll take lots of work, Damn will it hurt –  But victory’s calling My name. We’ll run through the field, Our sword and our shield –  Keeping the demons at bay. Soon it will pass, I’ll be a happy lass –  Living my life as I should. So, pack up a bag, No time to lag – An epic battle awaits. Take my hand, It’ll be so grand –  With you, stood by my side. Life will be right, I’ll sleep at night –  Horrors kept at bay. You’ll see me smile, You’ve been waiting a while –  For this momentous day. Finally, I’ll rest, The best of the best –  Wife and mother, I am. The battle won,  I’ll embrace the sun –  Feeling its luminous glow.

Forever isn’t such a long time, When it comes to you. Forever is how long I’ll spend in love, I know that much is true. The physical ache when we’re apart , Is visceral and cruel.

Hope floats above the Earth, with Sam and seven other twinkling stars. Tiny babies dancing -  Playing around, prancing, On magical pink and yellow fluffy clouds . A moment in my womb; forever in my everything. My stars glimmer like glittering snow - So bright and pure. My heart clenched  in the fists of my babies, not meant for this world; And in the laughter of 2 rainbow miracles , who fill my life with the most astounding, beautiful colour and light. My babies mean everything to me.

Wherever you go in life, I’ll be your shadow on a gloomy day. Telescopic lens, we’ll photograph the moon, Hoping crashing meteors fall our way. When your schizoaffective brain tricks you, Borrow my eyes, ears, and nose. Let insanity consume us together - I Promise, I won’t make you sniff my toes. Feeling anything but perfect? With me you can shed tears. We’ll be dafties together, Shattering any fears. And I love you, With every particle I am. Want you and need you -  That’s the master plan. Whatever you happen to do, I’m always by your side. Stuck to you like gorilla glue, I’ll find you when you hide. And I’m not going anywhere -  No getting rid of me. We promised forever and always, Even if you beg, scream, or plea. Our battle scars show us: We can make it through this life. No matter what’s thrown at us -  As Husband and Wife. I’ll be your cheerleader, Badly sing your favourite song. As long as we’re together, We can survive what goes wrong. Because I love you -  M...